Beached: (Adjective) Of a whale or similar animal stranded out of the water.

Because Brooke Hogan hasn't given up on trying to convince people that she's (A) sexy and (B) a talented singer, here she is splayed out in a bikini at the beach to shoot a new music video for her "comeback" single, "Falling." Hey, a creepy blonde writhing around on a beach in a bikini! There's an interesting concept for a music video. I guess if it's good enough for Heidi Montag, right? Although, at least to Heidi's credit no one had to call in animal control during the filming of her video. Oh, except for during one of the earlier takes when she accidentally bit the head off a seagull. Talk about embarrassing!

More of yuck, and try to divert your eyes away from the black hole: