Chin Dong Defined

A dildo that straps on to your chin.

The L.A. Times broke a story this week suggesting that Jay Leno, who agreed a couple of years ago to vacate the "Tonight Show" post in favor of Conan O'Brien, is having second thoughts now. NBC made the deal to avoid having O'Brien bolt to another network, but it looks more and more likely the plan will backfire, as Leno is apparently considering moving to another network himself after his contract expires in 2009, all of which naturally has NBC's panties in a twist. But what I don't understand is how the guy with a chin dong can continue to win out in the ratings war with Letterman? Is it the phallic shape of his chin? Is there something about it that comforts people before they fall asleep? The average age of a Leno viewer is 52, so in addition to the chin dong, there's a wealth of erectile dysfunction commercials. Maybe there's something potent about that combination, though for me, it just means cold-sweat nightmares about protruding chins and old ladies in beach chairs using their varicose veins as cock rings. *Save Me Jesus Shudder* Besides, if I want to see a nice chin dong, I'll watch the Evil Dead trilogy.