Apologetic: (Adjective) Regretfully acknowledging or excusing an offense or failure.

Sienna Miller came under some fire during the filming of her new film Mysteries of Pittsburgh, when, on location, she referred to the city as "Shitsburgh" to a reporter. Well, apparently it wasn't her fault, but the reporter's fault for failing to translate her great wit.

"It was a stupid joke because it rhymes. In the hands of a responsible journalist, humor and sarcasm will be translated appropriately," Miller told us with a smirk at the film's Cinema Society/Links of London screening. "It was not meant as disrespectful in any way. In England, we have great rhyming slang, and everyone spends their day rhyming. But for all the trouble that comment caused, there were many people who were supportive." (Source)

Wow, with all the rhyming going on with England, I'm surprised it's not a hotbed for up and coming rappers. Regardless, I think Sienna Miller is failing to see one key point here. Just like the blacks and the gays can use, uh, "certain words" affectionately towards each other, it doesn't mean everyone can. Maybe it's OK for someone from Pittsburgh to make fun of their city, but it doesn't give some spoiled British asshole the right to say it. Likewise, I may refer to where I live as "Filthadelphia" all the time, but if Sienna Miller came here and called it that I'd be the first in line to kick her in the vagina. That's not true. I'd probably still be first in line to kick her in the vagina, even if she didn't say that.

More of Sienna captured in a rare, clothed moment at the Mysteries of Pittsburgh screening:

Armed and Dangerous: (Phrase) One who is equipped with or carrying a weapon or weapons and is able or likely to cause harm or injury.

Kendra Wilkinson and Hank Baskett took a page from Heidi and Spencer and went on a little constitutional down to the shooting range recently. Because, awesome! A Playboy model with a gun! What could go wrong? Kendra wrote about the experience on her blog:

Hank and i went to the shooting range the other day so that he could teach me how to shoot a gun, or two or three hahaha. I think its so important that every woman learn self defense, plus its fun :D Im definitely a pro now haha!!

Check out these pics of me working the rifle and of Hank showing me how its done! (Source)

When I think of womens' self defense, I don't think of guns. I think of pressure points and mace and knowing just how to make a guy's nuts enter his stomach cavity; not a concealed firearm in your Chanel purse. But then again they are moving to my fair city of Philadelphia now, the land of milk and bullets. Most kids here are armed by the age of six. So yeah, maybe it wouldn't hurt to get a backup gun for her gun. Just in case.

Awe-Inspiring: (Adjective) Arousing awe through being impressive, formidable, or magnificent.

I know a lot of people think that Mickey Rourke is an asshole, and I'm not even necessarily disputing the fact. Say what you want about him, but you have to admit not many people can pull off meandering about the streets of Hollywood wearing a billowy, flowered shirt, carrying an open bottle of beer in their back pocket and stopping to make the friendly acquaintance of random, strange dogs along the way without being arrested. The closest I've come was some middle-aged guy I met in a bar one night who looked like Mickey Rourke wearing a hypercolor shirt with the sleeves cut off, who told me my hair looked like the hair of a statue with an erect penis at his mom's house. And since I can't vouch for that guy's whereabouts later that night, Mickey Rourke is still hands-down the champ at being publicly drunk and insane.

April Fool's: (Exclamation) Said to a person who is the victim of a trick or hoax on April 1.

When I heard that Cloris Leachman was wearing nothing but lettuce for a new PETA ad campaign I immediately broke out in terror sweats, picturing something along the lines of Botticelli's Birth of Venus with a few more lettuce leaves and a lot more sagging skin. So you can imagine how awesome it was to see this tasteful lettuce and cabbage gown adorning Ms. Leachman for the poster. Even more awesome? At the unveiling of the ad in Times Square yesterday, (pictured below) Cloris is wearing what appears to be shearling and suede scuffs. To a PETA event. God, how much do I love that? In your face, PETA! See? That's why you can't trust old people to do anything right. My Grandmother once ruined a perfectly good DVD player by trying to insert a VHS tape into it. She never did get to record her stories that day.