Oh, hey, how was your last night. Good? Did you go out for drinks? Stay home and watch "30 Rock" with a friend? Did your dad break into your apartment with police officers in order to try and get you to go to rehab? Yeah, guess which one happened to Lindsay Lohan and her insane, mesh-shirt sporting father?

i have no choice but to make this public, due to my sister's safety, as well as my own, "my ex-dad" just WALKED INTO MY APT like the devil's advocate with officers....

let's not forget, that my father KIDNAPPED me from a COURT ROOM when i was 4 years old and is CRAZY

he has NEVER paid child support, and is marrying a tabloid writer and can barely spell his own name due to his "brain" that has been ruined due to HIS drug use. (Source)

Once again, it's times like these that I'm incredibly thankful that my father is not a friggin' psychopath, and is instead just kind of a total dork. Believe me, if I had to choose between Michael Lohan's bitchtits breaking into my house for a surprise intervention, and my own Dad buying embarrassing t-shirts and constantly referring to me as "Daddy's Boy*," you better believe I'm picking my own Dad every single time.

*SERIOUSLY. MONEY. I will pay you MONEY to never say that again.