Jessica Simpson and her ginormous breasts of doom are appearing on today's "Ellen" show, and Ellen DeGeneres asked her to address the rumors that she doesn't brush her teeth. So naturally, Jessica laughed it off that it was all just a joke, right? Not so much.

"Well, not all the time," Simpson admits. "Maybe three times a week."

Explaining this stunning fact, Simpson says, "Because my teeth are so white and I don't like them to feel to slippery, but I do use Listerine and I do floss everyday. But I don't brush them everyday. I'll use a shirt or something."

Capping this admission, she says, "I know it's gross, but I always have fresh breath. It's really weird but I have great breath." (Source)

True story: When I was a Freshman in college, I got stuck with a roommate from West Virginia who was gross and never brushed her teeth. Finally after almost the entire semester went by, I took it upon myself to root through her things to see if she even owned a toothbrush and found a brand new one on the floor in the back of her closet, covered in dust. Point being, by southern hillbilly standards, if you think about it, Jessica Simpson is kind of a champion of dental hygiene. All I'm saying is, you know there are going to be people from Arkansas watching that "Ellen" going, "Three whole times a week?"