Mariah Carey Isn't Pregnant (She's Just Fat)

mariah112409.jpgAlright, so those rumours about Mariah Carey being preggers? Thankfully, those are completely untrue. So despite making vague statements, not drinking at an Oscar after-party (who does that?!) and generally looking like she's in her second trimester, Mariah Carey is not sporting a womb fruit.

"I have a lot of new acting projects coming up... But there's also something else very special on the way. I can't say any more," the Daily Star quoted her as telling reporters.

Carey then fuelled the rumours when she reportedly refused to drink at an after party, reports the Daily Star.

However, talking to GossipCop.com, a spokesperson for the pop star has dismissed the speculation, saying there's "no truth" to the pregnancy reports. (Source)


You see, the biggest flaw with this rumour is the simple fact that Mariah Carey would need to have sex in order to be pregnant. And as we all know, a succubus doesn't really have sex so much as it sucks the life out of men until they are a withered pile on the floor, and once they are done they move onto the next. Science my friends. SCIENCE.