Paris Hilton Sleeps With Pigs. What Else Is New?
After being a terrible pet owner to a chihuahua, a ferret and a monkey, Paris Hilton has decided to be a terrible owner to a teacup piglet. Knowing her, I'm giving the poor thing a week before Animal Control finds it dead in the bathroom with an empty pill bottle and a suicide note along the lines of "Paris Hilton is a disgusting whore." Need proof? She's actually making the poor thing sleep with her. Ugh.She said: "Doug and I will be lying in bed, watching DVDs, and she'll just lie there between us. She's a little sweetheart and I love her."
She explained to Britain's Hello! magazine: "My little brother bought a little pig when he was in Las Vegas and I was so jealous - I've always wanted one. I went online and found these tiny teacup pigs that stay under 12lb when they're fully grown. They're incredibly smart, lovable, really clean and litter trained." (Source)
Now that's just gross; I hope someone vaccinated her from the multitude of diseases she could get from so much as sharing a bed with Paris Hilton. ZING! But seriously, considering that she's fucked every trust fund douchebag in Hollywood, sharing a bed with a pig might be a step in the right direction for her.
The Famous Pig Song
(Clarke Van Ness, music by F. Henri Klickmann)
'Twas an evening in October, I'll confess I wasn't sober,
I was carting home a load with manly pride,
When my feet began to stutter and I fell into the gutter,
And a pig came up and lay down by my side.
Then I lay there in the gutter and my heart was all a-flutter,
Till a lady, passing by, did chance to say:
"You can tell a man that boozes by the company he chooses,"
Then the pig got up and slowly walked away.
'nuff said.
-Ralphie
They're incredibly smart...
She would know...