OMG U GUYZ
Those two Twilight dumbasses were caught -- gasp!! -- holding hands at an airport in France last night, ending months of speculation that they're secretly banging each other. Although I guess I can kind of understand the secrecy thing, since now that they've been exposed Kristen Stewart essentially has a hit out on her by like, a milliondey angry preteen girls. The temptation just proved too great, eh Kirsten? She's like that idiot who stole the Tyrannosaurus Rex eggs in Jurassic Park. Or was that Jurassic Park 2? Either way, I'd rather go head-to-head with a pissed off dinosaur than a mob of 13-year-old girls in heat. At the New Moon photocall in Paris yesterday:
The creepiest thing about Twilight fans is that most of those insane preteen girls and lonely soccer moms actually WANT Rob and Kristen to date.
And marry. And perhaps produce a baby named whateverthehellitis JUST LIKE IN THE BOOKS??!! CUZ OMG REAL LIFE NEEDS TO BE EXACTLY LIKE SOME LAME HORRIBLE BOOK OMGG ROBSTEN FOREVERRR!!
They are so both gay and not lovers.