The new PG-13 remake of The Stepfather is about as good as you would think, i.e. not at fucking all. (Pajiba)

Kim Cattrall passes the whore torch onto the representative of the next generation of trollops, Miley Cyrus. (Yeeeah!)

Holy Hell, is it just me or is Courtney Cox getting progressively hotter? (The Blemish)

Penn Badgley kissed a guy on the new episode of Gossip Girl. Yeah, I know, what a stretch, huh? (Seriously? OMG!)

So as it turns out, The Balloon Boy thing was a total hoax. Worse still: WHO THE FUCK NAMES THEIR KID FALCON? (Celebitchy)

Amy Winehouse shows off her shiny new boobies, and the results are about as realistic as you would expect. (Celebslam)

Megan Fox was named best Sci-Fi Actress, proving once and for all that Hollywood is dead. (HollyWire)

Trent Reznor got married this weekend, crushing the dreams of overly-obsessive internet nerds everywhere. (CelebSmack)

Christina Ricci: Still adorable, still tiny, still adorably tiny. (usemycomputer)

Ew, God, Katy Perry and Russell Brand kissed? How romantic. And by "Romantic", I mean "I just puked". (Allie Is Wired)

Oh, look, Beyonce's nipples. Because you've never seen those before, have you? (Celeb Jihad)