In Michael Lohan's latest finger-tenting scheme, he attempted to recruit Jon Gosselin to compete in one of his shammy celebrity boxing matches. Sure, because when I think of "boxing" I think of a paunchy Asian man who smokes too much.

"I am in the Celebrity Boxing Federation, so I had to go out to Philadelphia to meet with the chairman of the organization," Lohan told Usmagazine.com. "They asked me if Jon would fight, so I went up to Pennsylvania to visit Jon."

Although Lohan said Gosselin, 32, declined the offer to box in a charity match, the amateur boxer told Us that his visit allowed him to meet the Gosselin family, as the eight kids -- 9-year-old twins Mady and Cara and 5-year-old sextuplets Hannah, Leah, Alexis, Joel, Aaden and Collin -- were home. (Source)

OK, aside from the very fact that Jon Gosselin actually invited Michael Lohan into his home, (now he can come back whenever he wants, like a vampire -- also, I hope he remembered to do a "recount") I'm having some trouble with his geography here. I actually live in Philadelphia, but I'm fairly certain that I technically also live in Pennsylvania. Somebody get this man a Venn Diagram, STAT.