Here they are, The 50 Funniest Scenes in the History of Film. I suggest you take a quick pee break before you read this, lest you piss yourself laughing. (Pajiba)

Kanye's Max Headroom-looking ex-girlfriend topless in a thong? Oh yeah, I needed to see that. (Yeeeah!)

Brooke Hogan had to back out of a performance because she couldn't keep her gigantic schlong tucked in for, like, five fucking minutes. (The Blemish)

Joe Jonas? On American Idol? No, okay? NO. FUCKING STOP IT ALREADY. I AM FUCKING SICK OF COVERING AMERICAN IDOL. Also, Joe Jonas is a huge gay. (Seriously? OMG!)

Jay-Z and Oprah are super besties! I bet they stay up all night doing each other's hair and talking about boys... (Celebitchy)

Because the premiere of Inglourious Basterds simply didn't have enough beautiful people, here's Top Chef's Padma Lakshmi looking absolutely gorgeous. (Celebslam)

Because Mandy Moore is totally super cute, here she is promoting Red Bull Energy Douche. Where can I pick up a four-pack of this shit. (HollyWire)

I haven't bothered watching Big Brother, but oh my GOD, this Chima girl looks like she got whacked in the face with a frying pan full of red-hot ugly sauce. (CelebSmack)

Here is Kat Dennings and her huge boobs looking fucking adorable at the premiere of some shitty kids movie. (usemycomputer)

Whoa, goddamn! Nick Adams has two tickets to the GUN SHOW MOTHAH FUCKAHS!(popbytes)

Here's the trailer for the best movie that I have absolutely no interest in whatsoever, James Cameron's Avatar. (Celeb Jihad)