Oh goodie, what better way to start off your week then with a sign of the impending apocalypse: Heidi Montag wants to have a baby. All of a sudden, that crazy guy standing outside your office building with the "Repent! The End is Nigh!" sign doesn't seem quite so crazy, does he? Well, the good news is, Spencer isn't so keen on the idea, which I think marks the first time he's ever had a rational thought in his head.

"Heidi is the one with the baby fever; Spencer is not," Stephanie told MTV News, adding that the wannabe singer, 22, might be taking her motherhood cues from the local book store.

"Here's the deal: Basically, Heidi got married; [then] she's like, 'Oh my God, what do I do?'" she explained. "I really feel like she went to a bookstore and saw 'Newlyweds: The Wife's Edition,' and so now she's like, 'I still want to get a house with a white picket fence... and then probably a dog, and then we'll move on to kids. And I want to take cooking lessons.'" (Source)

HA! Please, like Heidi reads books. She'd probably sit around poking it with a stick trying to figure out how "The Word Sandwich" works. God help the poor child that pops out of her vajooter. I wonder if she and Spencer know that you can't return a baby for store credit if you don't like it.