Kim Kardashian is Single
Kim Kardashian has confirmed that she and and her boyfriend, Reggie Bush of the New Orleans Saints, have split up. Oh, they were still together? I totally forgot since they're so boring and all."Nobody cheated," a source close to the couple says. "This is just a case of conflicting schedules and their lives going in different directions.
"It was a totally mutual decision," continues the source. (Source)
I love how the gut reaction is to deny cheating. Like, okay Kim. No one accused her of getting peed on by another guy. And even if she were getting peed on by another guy, is that so wrong? Either way, there's lots of urine out there in the world, and she's still young. So let's everybody just cut her some slack.
At a "Keeping Up With the Kardashians" panel in Atlantic City last weekend:
The only thing that could have made the video you posted yesterday at Pajiba funnier, Stacey, would have been if Sister Kardashian had been the one singing it.
I want Reggie's people to come out and say, "HELL YEAH there was cheatin'. Reggie's in the NFL, Bee-otch. He's famous for HITTIN' IT, and ain't no lazy girl with lazy-skank sisters keepin' up with Reggie. SHEE-AT!"
Something like that. Something suitable for the occasion.
Which one, Garfield's Slutty Cat Girlfriend Kardashian? I think assuming that her vagina is only eight miles wide is being pretty kind.
If any of them need comfort, I'm available. I don't discriminate.
Conflicting schedules? WHAT SCHEDULE BITCH? You don't have a job!