Oh, what a fucking surprise. Jon Gosselin's new girlfriend Hailey Glassman is "Bisexual". Shocker. But of course, this isn't the real kind of bisexual. This is "Bisexual", which basically translates into "I want to be famous and I'll pretend to love anyone who will further my career". I'm looking at you, St. Tila Tequila.

Jon Gosselin's new wild girlfriend, Hailey Glassman, "is bisexual," one of her college pals confirms to the new issue of Us Weekly, on stands now.

"She's open about it, and I've seen it happen," the friend goes on.

Glassman -- who was arrested in 2005 for marijuana possession -- is more serious about women than men, a college classmate says. (Source)

Let this be a lesson to you all. Next time you want to know whether someone is Bisexual or "Bisexual", just ask them which one they'd rather have: A loving relationship with someone of either sex, or a one-night stand with a Z-List celeb who's only claim to fame is essentially holding his eight children hostage for a show on TLC. Judge their answer accordingly.