This is Just Ridiculous
Brooke Hogan leaked the cover for her upcoming CD on her website, and somehow it manages to look tons more low budget than her crappy new music video. I'm guessing they tried to make her look less manly by just drawing an illustration of her, but the result looks like the cover artwork from one of those cheesy paperback fantasy novels with sexy elven warriors and dragons and crap. No wait, I take that back. 14-year-old boys spend valuable time masturbating to illustrations of those sexy elven warriors, and to compare Brooke Hogan to such is an insult to the masturbatory fantasies of 14-year-old boys.Brooke on her 21st birthday at Pure nightclub. Actually, seeing these photos, she much more closely resembles a Fabio book cover, anyway:
Actually, the pic is too cheap-looking for a dime store romance novel. Think cheesy murals done graffiti-style in say East Los Angeles.
How in HELL is she only 21?
I am now terrified that in two years time I will look like a 45 year old hooker who has spent the majority of her life on crack, while rolling in orange paint, and topping off the look with a tranny's wig. And not one of the classy ones.
Sweet Tap Dancing Jehovah! This looks like something one might see painted on the side of a 1970's molester van. Only instead of innocent children, she's out to rape our ears.
I totally wanna get that design airbrushed on a t-shirt. It will go really well with my mullet.
Also, I refuse to believe that's Brooke until I see video and hear her talk. That looks like a 50 year-old cougar who just got her tits done. In other words, it looks like Linda Bollea.
If you have any love for your eyeballs you will NOT click on the thumbnails to enlarge the photos.
No, no, no. What it really looks like is... it looks exactly like one of those cheap mini posters that you could win at the county 4-H fair if you pop 3 balloons with darts (5 throws for $3). I can see it leaning up against the greasy plywood stand next to the Harley Davidson Logo and a picture of a dragon on a tie-dye background.
Except that there is something wrong with her eyes. The eyes look like the way I would draw eyes on a portrait and they would always look kind of conspicuous and not quite right (but I can't draw, so...)
ok, enough similes for one day.