So, if you haven't heard, Nick Cannon and Eminem are fighting. I didn't cover it before, because, well, it's fucking retarded. First Eminem "dissed" Mariah Carey and her glorified purse-holder in one of his new songs and then Nick Cannon wrote like a 20,000-word response to it on his blog, which was subsequently removed -- but not gone forever, because as Joe Rogan on "NewsRadio" once famously said: "Taking something off the internet is like taking pee out of the swimming pool." Anyway, Eminem is apparently delighted that someone actually noticed him because now he's adding fuel to the fire:

In the song, Eminem raps: "Nick Cannon better back the f*** up. I'm not playing, I want her back, you punk. Nick Cannon, you pr**k, I wish you luck with that f***in' whore."

Nick fumed over the lyrics and has vowed Eminem's words will have "repercussions". But the warning has been ignored as Em took another shot at Mariah as he spoke on his satellite channel Shade 45.

He told listeners: "We're taking callers right now (from) any woman who wants to be peed on." When asked what he'd say to Mariah if she called in, the MC replied: "I already did that." (Source)

I hate to break it to you, but Eminem didn't really pee on Mariah Carey. In fact, it's questionable, at best, if he even got to second base with her. But you know what? I really hope he did. Because then Mariah would still be denying hooking up with Eminem even though she ended up marrying some dude from Nickeloedeon. Eminem himself could write diss songs for another hundred years and not come up with a better insult than that.

Mariah and Purse Holder at their first anniversary: (And I said it wouldn't last!)