Trashed
Trashed: (Verb) To have discarded.Hey guys, I'm back! Sorry about yesterday, a personal crisis prevented me from posting anything. But I promise -- promise -- I will not be leaving you again anytime soon. At any rate, I have to start the day out with some sad news: Lindsay Lohan's anticipated (and only) film project Labor Pains is not going to be coming to a movie theater near you anytime soon. Or, ever. Instead, the film is bypassing the straight-to-DVD route and going straight-to-TV. Cable TV.
The film's production company, Nu Image/Millennium Films, has confirmed that the comedy will premiere on ABC Family in July 2009. It will be released on DVD a month later.
This week, the much-scrutinized star, 22, complained, "If people would just leave my personal life alone - because it's really not that interesting - then I could land a great role. But all the sicko fans and the noise is so distracting." (Source)
That's right Lindsay, it's everyone else's fault that your movie is going straight to cable. Just so you know it's not your fault. No, not at all whatsoever. Just like it wasn't my fault that my roommate decided to snoop through my email and read things I said about her that she didn't like and throw all my shit in trashbags while I wasn't home and leave it in the garage and tell me to get out immediately. Oh, except that actually kind of was my fault because I chose to live with a fucking psychopath. I'm pretty sure Lindsay's in the clear, though.
If you need a place to stay there is this really nice abandoned car next to a McDonalds near my college. Options are available.
And if this is a no joking time I'm sorry about your psychopath and everything always works out.
Yow. Sorry to hear about your psycopath. Want me to come over and bitchslap her? 'Cos I totally would. Today feels like a bitchsmaking day.
On the way, I can get Lindsay. For being an irresponsible dickwad who doesn't take responsibility for her own dumbass actions.
Wait... seriously?
Gee, she really showed you. I mean, why would you think she was a psycho when she's going to flip out, box up all your things and throw you out with the smallest sign that you're not best friends?
Lindsay Lohan needs some real parents, ones like mine that will make her feel guilty about not doing shit she's supposed to do. That's what parents are for, people! They're there to teach you how wrong you are most of the time! Not to enable you and your misplaced sense of self-importance!
Oh, and the punchline is that the day before all this happened, she asked for the rent check early because she couldn't pay her bills. I tried to cancel the check but it had already gone through, that bitch.
But if she's cashed your rent cheque already (sorry, I'm Canadian), aren't you legally entitled to stay there until the end of April unless she gives you the money back? There has to be something that can be done, that's ridiculous!
Though the VD medication is probably quite expensive. Especially since it's eating at her brain.