Kitty Purry says that she and Benji are "just friends." (CelebWarship)

Three words: Lesbian, vampire and killers. Boom! (Pajiba)

It may not be socially acceptable to get trashed on Monday nights after 21 or 22, but hey -- I'm 31 and I still manage to pull it off. (College Candy)

Lindsay Lohan might be all up on Chace Crawford's dick. (Celebitchy)

Hayden and Milo (I'm not even attempting their last names) have split to a "lifestyle conflict." Uhhh, meaning, she's still 19 and he's still 31. (The Blemish)

Suri Cruise got to go to Disney World and it looks like her dad didn't even flirt with Prince Charming. (Seriously? OMG!)

What a shocker... Miley Cyrus's parents are apparently exercising parental control. (Parental control FAIL.) (Yeeeah!)

Brigitte Nielsen rocks a pantsuit better than Kitty Purry. (Ayyyy!)

Not quite nipple slipping is the hottest new trend in Hollywood. (cityrag)

I knew Criss Angel couldn't get a girlfriend like Holly Madison without drugging her. (BricksAndStones)

Short of trotting her up on a scale in public, I can't really make the call whether or not Kelly Clarkson's weight ir normal or unhealthy. (POTP)

Scarlett Johansson gets her airbrush on for Dolce & Gabbana. (Popoholic)

Paris Hilton showed her vadge again? Must be Tuesday. (IDWYL)