Role Model
Role Model: (Noun) A person looked to by others as an example to be imitated.14-time Olympic Gold Medal winner Michael "Face of Butter" Phelps has issued a public apology after News of the World published a photo of him smoking marijuana out of what the kids today refer to as a "bong."
"I engaged in behavior which was regrettable and demonstrated bad judgment," the all-time Olympic swimming champ said Sunday in a statement released by his marketing agency, Octagon. "I'm 23 years old, and despite the successes I've had in the pool, I acted in a youthful and inappropriate way, not in a manner people have come to expect from me. For this, I am sorry. I promise my fans and the public it will not happen again." (Source)
Damn straight it better not happen again. From what the anti-drug commercials have led me to believe, if he continues down this dark path of smoking weed he could literally end up killing his own grandmother. Well, either that or forgetting her birthday. I can't remember which.
More of Face of Butter enjoying some good clean fun at South Beach last month:
I wish he'd said "look assholes, self-medication is the American way... next Olympic games I'll have a gift registry all set up at Holy Smokes. Remember that."
Remember, folks, NEVER let anyone photograph or record you doing drugs. Seems fun at the time, but it always comes back to bite you, and you always look like a doofus sucking on the "water pipe".
The same goes for sex tapes, yo. It's only sexy to you, and they always get "stolen" by the ex. Nobody wants to see you getting freaky.
The red outside of the bong mouth makes him look like he has those(now edited out) big comical lips that happened when the gun blew up in your face in old cartoons.
Today, when I read Michael Phelps apology for being caught on camera smoking a bong, I felt a bit wonky myself. It was as if I was wearing yesterday's damp speedo. You know that feeling? Uneasy in the stomach and the constant urge to bring your knees up really high when walking in an effort to attract more air to the tiny wet garment. Why was I feeling this bizarre gamy deja vu? Can't pin-point it. Then it hit me as I was driving to lunch, DING! This feels weird because his apology is almost word for word the exact same apology Phelps issued when he got popped for DUI in Baltimore after the last Olympics. That's it! A carbon foot print copy. I bet you forgot about that DUI.
"I won't do it again, I promise." Mike you said that 5 years ago. What gives? I mean hey the kid is just 23, but what an insulting apology. As someone who has a masters in apologies, I would rather he just said nothing. He has become a hero to millions. They sold his achieved dream to billions and that garb is all we get. Maybe they think we're dumb. And that we wouldn't care as long as he said he was sorry. Not so fast Mike. I bet you'll feel thi$ one.
Like C. S. Lewis said, "With each choice you make you are either getting closer to goodness and peace or further away." The bong hit was bonehead, but Phelps response was a roach in the filter - a real 2 for one deal.