Treehugger: (Noun) An environmental campaigner (used in reference to the practice of embracing a tree in an attempt to prevent it from being felled).

You know how I knew the holidays were finally upon us this years? No, not the incessant Christmas music blasting in every godforsaken business or retailer I frequent, or the retarded, garish, giant blow-up Frosty the Snowmans sitting on every other suburban lawn, or even the photo cards with people's stupid kids on them filling up my mailbox. No... Because I didn't really know Christmastime was here until Heidi and Spencer exploited it for a special holiday-themed staged photoshoot!

Boy, as if it didn't suck enough to be a Christmas tree already: getting cut down, robbed of life, and decorated with a bunch of tacky crap until your needles start falling off and you go in the backyard until summer incineration time... But this poor tree has the added humiliation of being molested by Beardy McShitSandwich and Empty Rattle Head McGee on top of everything. Merry effing Christmas!