Produce Molestation
Produce Molestation: (Noun) To assault or abuse produce sexually.God, it has been such a slow gossip news week. Painfully slow. You'd think there were some kind of presidential election or global economic crisis going on or something. But then I see these pictures of Heidi and Spencer acting retarded like business as usual, seeing what they can do to put a bunch of pumpkins in therapy for the rest of their pumpkiney lives, and I see that all is right in the world.
That is absolutely repugnant.
Pumpkins check. Melons check. Ok now what fruit or vegetable will she hold up in front of her fake tits next?
They're so fucking embarrassing. Ugh.
aaauugh!
why are they not running an endless gauntlet of outstretched hands seeking to slap them silly, or at least pull out some hair or graze an eye or something?! Why are they not being attacked physically? Why! [--mind snap--] ...
Do these two hire someone to follow them around just to catch these "candid" moments? What the hell is wrong with them? They look like a really bad GAP ad!