Armed and Stupid

heidispencer0619_1.jpg Armed and Stupid: (Colloquial) One who is equipped with or carrying a weapon or weapons and is able or likely to cause harm or stupidity.

Heidi Pratt and Spencer Montag have become concerned that their disliked reputation may put them at a safety risk, so they decided to do the rational thing and lay low for awhile -- instead of their usual whoring around annoying everybody so much. Kidding! They went out and spent over $10 grand on firearms.

They purchased two Benelli semiautomatic M4 tactical shotguns, two Wilson close quarter combat .45-caliber pistols and one Scout semiautomatic rifle. “They wanted the exact guns that the U.S. Delta Force uses,” a friend explains. Spencer wants to be prepared for anything,” says the friend. (Source)

Well that sounds fabulous, in the event of alien or Tyrannosaurus Rex attack -- but otherwise I don't think they have anything to worry about. While it's true that 100% of people do hate Heidi and Spencer on some level, no one cares about Heidi and Spencer enough to actually risk the legal repercussion of doing harm to them. In fact, most people hate Spencer and Heidi just enough that they'll think it's uproariously hilarious when one of them accidentally shoots the other one in the face with one of their Delta Force guns. I might be a little sad though, because then I won't be able to make easy, shooting fish in the barrel, phone-it-in jokes about them anymore after I've been up all night drinking. Eh, it'll still be worth -- it just to see the holes in their faces! (Editor's note: I kill me!)

Fact: even children and Barney hate Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt.

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4 Comments


Slappy said:

Please someone. Kill them.


kim said:

Please PLEASE someone kill them.


vic said:

I'm hoping that one day there'll be a violent revolution and they end being the first two people against the wall.

Nah, I'm not that mean. But it's still nice to think about for some reason.


I apologize for my unfair stance on the 2nd Amendment. Clearly, gun laws work. C'mon statistics! Work in my favor!

Doesn't matter who gets shot. They'll end up bedazzling their motorized wheelchairs and colostomy bags.