Look at this magazine! Who is that hot lookin' lady on cover? Is that me? Oh, I had no idea! None whatsoever. I was just thumbing through the periodicals in my local Border's -- you know, reading about the writer's strike, which is very important issue and I support the writers 100 percent, I even spent 10 minutes picketing one day, you may have seen me; I was the one standing in front of the photographers -- and anyway, I picked up this Vanity Fair because I heard there was an article about Gloria Steinem, who is a feminist, and -- oh, did I mention I was a feminist, too? Oh yeah -- I believe that women ought not show excessive amounts of skin unless, you know, it's for a good cause, like the writer's strike. So, anyway, I just walked out with this copy that I just happened to be carrying like this when you walked by with your camera. What a clinky dink! Oh, did I mention that the magazine called me "Hollywood's hottest blonde?" I mean, I don't believe that or anything, and really, it doesn't matter because, like, beauty is only skin deep and ... what's that?

You wanna see the photos inside? Oh, let me show you -- it's for a good cause, right? You support the writers, don't you? I mean, I'm only showing you cause I don't want to be rude: